Screwed Up
by UnderTheGrave
Summary: (MxM Cryde, SLIGHT Clybe) Craig and Clyde were perfectly content with their age-old routine... But having the best damn sex ever with your best friend, as non-conditional as you try to make it, has its ways of royally messing things up. Can they make things go back to normal? Or... do they even want to? (Lots of smut. Somebody stop me, dear god.)
1. Chapter 1

In many ways, the two were polar opposites. They always had been.

While Craig Tucker was cynical, stoic, and often cold around strangers, Clyde Donovan was sensitive, kind to anyone, and entirely too emotional. Clyde couldn't recall seeing his friend cry. Ever. Craig had probably seen Clyde cry at least twice a month since elementary school.

Craig dealt with his anger and sadness internally. By the time his friends usually learned about these emotions, they had long passed. When Clyde was upset, all of town basically knew within an hour.

Craig could not have cared less about sports. He'd rather break his own leg than to be forced to participate in one. Clyde was by no means a stereotypical jock, but enjoyed watching sports like football and playing them with his average-sized friend group. It kept him in shape and blew off pent-up steam.

Craig was factual. He didn't deal with bullshit. In English class, deep discussions on "What does poetry mean?" or "How can writing help us convey our emotions?" made him fall right to sleep. He preferred things with straight forward sets of rules, such as math. Clyde was entirely in tune during these same kinds of English lectures. Although he had his air-headed moments with science, math, and everyday things in general at times, the brunette was great at putting his thoughts down in his class papers. He got teary-eyed over the in class reading of "Invictus" by William Henley and was forever thankful that nobody had noticed.

Conveying emotions in a way other than embarrassing himself with crying was relieving. He kept his ramblings hidden in a journal and he imagined that Craig needed to try it. He imagined no one - not even Craig - could bottle up feelings entirely... It just couldn't be healthy. Still, keeping a diary- Fuck, _no_. It wasn't a gay-ass _diary_. A journal. Keeping a _journal_ full of badly written poetry and day-to-day ramblings was pretty lame, Clyde imagined. It wasn't something he wanted to admit to even his closest friend.

Anyway, these were only a few of their differences.

If there was one thing they shared above their love for food, horrible jokes, video games, and hilariously lame, "dank" memes, it was their need for routine.

Both of them hated _change_. Chaos. In a town like South Park that is constantly crawling in it, they clung to any balance they could find.

They found this balance - this unchanging routine - in each other. They both wanted to spend time with one another on set days each week, with no other plans able to interrupt their own. They needed to sit at the same table, in the same seats, with the same people. This was why Craig Tucker and Clyde Donovan clicked. As the people and world around them changed, they stayed the same together. The only thing that grew aside from their bodies was their silent, unaccepted dependence on one another.

However, nothing stays the same completely. Change- No. _Shit_ happens.

They'd made it under a set routine up - managed to avoid change - until senior year. The end of high school brings inevitable changes in itself, of course. College... Finding jobs... The dreaded, "What are you going to be when you grow up?" question from Grammy.

They were already dreading the end of the year, but graduation proved to be the least drastic change about to take place.

When a simple conversation turned in to a simple request, which then turned in to... Well, a _massive_ change. A flat-out _rapture_ in routine.

It arguably started right when Craig showed up at Clyde's house, just as he did every Friday evening. Everything was exactly the same as it had always been; Craig had brought over a few extra PS4 games, stopped and grabbed a quick, cheap pizza from Little Caesar's, and banged loudly on the Donovan residence's front door with his foot until Clyde's father showed him inside. No other plans could really interrupt their Friday nights. They'd rather stay in and be lame, boring assholes. Not attend any cliche high school party.

Clyde had seemed a little off when Craig first entered his room, but the noirette didn't think much of how he'd just been staring pensively out of his window; his friend was a spacey kid in general. They simply demolished the entire pizza and settled down in to a few different video games. After a while, when it had grown dark outside, Clyde was scrolling through his phone while Craig played GTA solo.

"Are you still planning on doing that summer job or whatever?" Clyde had asked at one point, simply to break a fairly comfortable silence.

"Mom's been bitching at me to get one, so yeah."

A loud explosion blared from a TV speaker.

"Did you fill out the application?"

"Not yet. I think Kevin's gonna put in a good word for me."

Clyde nodded and slurped loudly on his watered-down cup of cola.

"Well, it sounds like a pretty fun job though, dude. Maybe your pale ass will actually get a tan."

"It's an _indoor_ water park, dumbass."

They snickered in unison. Just when Clyde figured that comfortable silence was about to settle between them once again, Craig's voice rose up.

"How are you and Bebe doing?"

Clyde's eyes rested on his best friend, swirling with a mixture of confusion and striking hazel. It was completely out-of-character for Craig to show interest in Clyde's helpless romantic endeavors. He'd always listen to Clyde's ramblings, but never pressed for more.

He'd begrudgingly let Clyde cry on his shoulder on numerous occasions over girls, though.

The raven-haired boy glanced back at him before looking back at the television nonchalantly.

"What, dude? I was trying to be friendly," he muttered while mashing his PS4 controller. The sound of gunshots and a single explosion came from the speakers, but Clyde did not look back to watch the havoc taking place in GTA 5.

"Ha, I can see that. It threw me off," Clyde finally hummed. He placed his phone down at his side.

He watched the noirette roll his eyes before he continued to speak.

"We're doing great... Uh, she..." The brunette trailed off, effectively capturing Craig's attention.

"Eh? What? Did she finally say yes to going out with you?"

"She told me her parents are going to be out of town tomorrow and that I should stay over... Haha, she kind of implied we'd finally-"

A whistle cut Clyde off, but the tone that followed was ironically flat. "Clyde's finally gonna get some. About fucking time she stopped leading you on."

"Ha, yeah..."

The game paused.

"So why do you look so torn up about it then? Shouldn't we be celebrating for you or something?"

"I'm nervous, duh!"

"Aw, how sweet. I'm gonna puke."

"Dude, shut up," Clyde laughed, shoving his friend's shoulder. After earning a shove back, he looked at his shoes and added, "Well, it's just that she's done it before and I-"

"Wow, really? _Bebe's_ had sex before? Pure little Bebe?" Craig's voice dripped with sarcasm.

"Craig," Clyde muttered seriously. His brows knitted together. "She isn't a slut, okay? Stop calling her one. She's only been with two other people. That's less than you."

"Are you implying _I'm_ a slut?" Craig shot back, unaffected by his friend's jab. "Do you have some kind of reason to be asking me about this instead of Token or Jimmy? You said I give shitty advice with this kind of stuff, right?"

"Well, you do."

Craig hadn't been in a committed relationship since Tweek cut off whatever weird-ass, long-term thing they had going. That was back during freshman year. They were still close friends, but most people chalked it up to the fact that... Well, again: Craig never changed or matured completely. Both him and Clyde still had their childish moments that don't really ever work too well with mature relationships.

"Are you gonna spit out what were you saying before I interrupted you, or can I get back to this mission?" the raven asked, gaze flicking back to the screen.

Difference was, Clyde still _tried._

"Oh, um, yeah, but" Clyde floundered. "...Don't fucking laugh. I'll kick your ass."

Craig looked smug, but nodded nonetheless. "I'll try my best."

"Well, the guys she was with before were obviously, uh, experienced... Like, how can I compete with Kenny in bed? I feel like I'll disappoint her because I'll have no idea what I'm doing, I'll probably jizz my pants in like, five seconds, and I kind of just want it to be sweet and not kinky for my first time, b-but what if she wants me to be super-"

"You shouldn't try and compare yourself to Kenny McCormick when it comes to sex," Craig hummed. His appreciative, dreamy stare in to space made Clyde cringe and punch his shoulder.

"I don't wanna know! Ugh!"

"Again, why are you asking me when I'm not even in to girls...? You could ask Token. He'd be able to give you all kinds of pointers on the lame vanilla sex you wanna have."

Clyde's face was burning. He looked at his shoes and grew strangely silent.

"...Dude," he heard Craig huff. He refused to look, but could hear him shift as he set down the controller and ran a hand through his hair. "Listen. If Bebe's really in to you, she's not going to care if you aren't perfect at first. It's kind of universally cool and flattering to know you're somebody's first time, actually. People eat that shit up. You'll get better at it the more you do it."

"It's just-" Clyde blubbered, getting emotional. Craig cringed and huffed.

"Dude, whatever you do, _don't_ start crying when you're fucking her. Jesus..."

"I'm just- I'm not big, I'm just average, so I don't have that, and...! Like, I have this belly fat right here that she won't like and-"

"Clyde," Craig said seriously. "If you're just going to freak the fuck out about it like this, tell her you can't go tomorrow. Make up an excuse. You obviously aren't even ready."

Craig wanted to laugh at how helpless his best friend was, but figured that'd be mean by the way he was pinching his stomach with a brooding expression.

"Besides," the noirette hummed, leaning his back against the end of the bed. "It doesn't even matter if you're average. It's not like it's bad to be average. It's fucking _average_ , not small. Knowing how to use the thing is what's important."

"But I _don't_ know how to use it!"

"Oh my god, man. We're going in circles with this whole conversation," Craig muttered. His patience was wearing thin. It was stunning he'd already made it as long as he had without telling his friend to suck it up and go grab them more junk food. "You'll _learn_."

"I want to learn before tomorrow," Clyde blurted suddenly, as if that had been what he was originally trying to get out in the first place. "I just want her to be impressed and date me, dude. I don't want to cum too fast. I don't want to be so nervous that I can't even get hard. I just... I want to know what I'm doing. Or at least have a tiny idea... I don't... I don't want her to date me just because she feels sorry for me! That's all I want."

"That's all, huh?" Craig grumbled caustically. "...How are you going to do that?"

"Can you help me?" Clyde was still blurting things out desperately. "Craig, can you just please... let me fuck you so I can get it over with? Get a feel for it?"

An unsettling silence set over the room. Clyde instantly knew he should not have asked that. By the way Craig looked at him - his eyes narrowed and his brows knitted tightly together - Clyde only wanted to punch himself.

Craig was shocked and undeniably pissed off.

"Did you really just ask me that?"

Clyde felt the urge to tear up all over again. He started to stand before he could even come up with an excuse to leave the room. "Sorry, I know. I said something fucking retarded again. Forget I said anything."

Craig yanked him back down. His lips were pulled in to a tight frown.

Clyde's eyes widened. For a brief moment, he was entirely certain that his friend was about to slug him.

"Clyde, I'm your best friend. We can't just fuck each- Oh my god," the noirette huffed. He released his tight grip on the brunette's arm and buried his face in his hands. "I can't believe you'd- Would you even be able to get it up for me? I'm a guy. You know, a human with a _dick?_ It's entirely different than Bebe. _"_

"Well, yeah. I'm not that stupid... It's why I'm talking to you about it instead of Token, or basically any of my other friends. I wouldn't go to them for this sort of... request."

Craig blinked in confusion before hissing out, "Gee, thanks? Nice to know I'm the designated 'practice friend.'"

Another suffocating silence made Clyde scramble for the right words.

"Dude! Haha! Calm the fuck down," he blurted, putting on his most convincing grin. "I'm totally fucking with you. Oh my god, your face was priceless."

"Stop," Craig shot back shortly. He stood up, making Clyde quake with regret over the entire situation. He just wanted to cry. At the same time, he'd never wanted to _not_ cry as he did right then, in such a painfully awkward moment that was all his fault. He didn't _want_ to look so fucking _childish._

Before he could attempt to leave the room once again, the PS4 was shut off and Craig was gone from the room.

He wiped his eyes and cursed through is teeth. For about a minute, he wondered if Craig had just left... He _couldn't_ have though, could he? He'd left his bag.

That minute felt like an hour.

Why the hell did he say that out loud? _Fuck._

"You really like her, don't you...? It's that important to you?"

Clyde jerked his hand away from his face in surprise. He hadn't even realized Craig had reentered the room, but... there he was. Standing in the doorway with a glass of water that was already halfway empty. He'd taken a few big, thoughtful gulps on the way up the stairs.

He managed to nod jerkily and blink back his tears of embarrassment.

"...Ugh. Promise me that this won't make anything awkward between us. Promise me you aren't going to blow this out of fucking proportion like you tend to do, Clyde. I'm just helping your helpless ass out, and that's _all_ this is."

"...Nothing can make things awkward between you and me, dude," he uttered weakly with an oafish smile. Something about it seemed to strike a chord, which was reflected in then noirette's dull gray eyes. Craig hesitantly trudged over and set the glass of water beside the TV.

"Pinkie swear."

The two locked their little fingers, in the most childish form of a contract.

* * *

 **A/N: This was supposed to be a one-shot. God, I have NO self control. =u=**

 **If you like it so far, be sure to leave a review! What are our favorite immature assholes about to get themselves in to? ;o**


	2. Chapter 2

"Clyde," Craig started simply, touching his friend's face to make him lock their eyes together.

At some point he'd shuffled down on to Clyde's lap, slipped off his own t-shirt, and draped his arms lazily around his neck. The brunette stared across to him, stunned and in denial that the whole thing was even happening.

"You need to get me worked up... Think about how you'd get Bebe turned on. It's basically the same."

Clyde's eyes flickered down Craig's lean, pale torso. He just stared dumbly.

His friend was a bit rangy; he didn't have much muscle anywhere, aside from a little bit of tone on his arms. His skin was perfectly unblemished and soft. Clyde wanted to comment that his nipples were the perfect size and shade of light, rosy pink, but... that was totally fucking gay. He was quickly caught up in forcing the thought from his mind.

"...So, how're you going to do that?" the raven urged, sensing Clyde's hesitation.

"...Kiss you- Her?"

Craig rolled his eyes.

"Sure, that's one way... So do it."

For a few moments, Clyde was frozen. He hadn't even expected his friend to agree; he was just desperate and worked up when the whole fucking proposal spilled out.

"Clyde. Bring her close to you, like this," came a whisper. Two soft hands rested on Clyde's cheeks and pulled him in. "Make her stare in to your eyes... Let your eyes express how much you want her. And, still holding her gaze, lean in, and-"

Craig faltered. His eyes widened. His best friend's lips pressed wholeheartedly against his. Their eyes met and the raven watched, impressed but startled, as Clyde let his own flutter shut.

A tongue parted his lips and he opened readily with a sharp intake of breath.

Through the wet, open-mouthed kiss, Clyde squeaked out, "Was that too fast?"

Craig let his hands slide to the back of Clyde's head, where he threaded his fingers in to his hair and tugged softly. The following half startled, half pleasured yelp that rose from the other male's throat made his pulse skip.

"Doing good... Clyde, are you- _Oh_."

Craig and tried to press his ass down in to Clyde's lap to investigate and ended up answering his own question. His friend was already completely hard, and not just _average._

"Clyde," he bit out. "You need to give yourself more fucking credit. You're _not_ average down here."

His friend had some major self-image issues, but Craig never figured it would have an effect on how he viewed _that_ as well.

"I'm not...? But those guys in porn have way bigger-"

"Hush," Craig muttered sharply, briefly wondering what kind of fucking porn was Clyde watching. "We're still practicing. Don't get side tracked."

Clyde gulped and nodded. "What next?"

"Try and figure it out on your own... Don't look at me like that. Think. How would you proceed with Bebe doing... this?"

As he spoke, the noirette ground against Clyde's clothed erection. By just feeling at what was hidden through Clyde's jeans with his ass, Craig was almost entirely aroused.

"I'd- I would, uh-"

Instead of trying to stammer out the rest, the fully-clothed of the two wrapped his strong arms around his friend and staggered awkwardly to get up. He slung Craig on to the bed and flopped on top of him. The sudden weight knocked the breath out of the boy underneath.

"Nice," the boy underneath uttered simply. "You- _Woah_ , uh, y-yeah, just like that. Getting her panties off. Do you even need my help? Ha..."

Clyde had already shucked Craig's pants and underwear down to his ankles and he helped by kicking them off the rest of the way.

He took note that the sudden burst of confidence his friend just exhibited seemed to wane abruptly once he was exposed to him. He figured it was sobering to see his dick, flared proudly against his abdomen, instead of a girl's body.

Clyde surprised him again. He reached for his own pants and undid his belt. Craig squirmed in anticipation as he realized he was about to see the full extent of what Clyde kept hidden in his pants.

This all seemed so _wrong_...

"Do you fucking _wax?_ " Clyde stammered.

Craig blinked at the question. He'd been entirely ready for Clyde to reveal his body, but the brunette seemed to be stalling... Made sense to be hesitant about exposing a boner to his best friend, the raven figured. Clyde was staring at his own exposed body in awe, which made Craig feel the need to duck underneath the comforter.

So fucking _wrong._

"Do you really think I want that "Craig's mom's bush" shit from elementary school turned on me...? And I just shave."

Clyde simply nodded, bit his lip, and left it at that.

"So, you won't mind if I'm a little hairy, r-right...?"

He finally pushed his pants down until they fell to his knees, along with a pair of generic green boxers.

The fact that Clyde could not appreciate his own body was astounding.

After swallowing at a lump in his throat and trying not to made the other uncomfortable with a long stare, Craig grunted, "Your shirt."

Clyde was suddenly faltering all over again.

"...D-Do I have to take my shirt off?"

His eyes shifted away embarrassedly as Craig blinked at him and realized why he was hesitating.

"You don't have to if you don't want to... She might want you to be naked too, but- Clyde, chill out. Forget the shirt. It's _fine_."

"No, you're right," the brunette bit out. He managed to stop himself right before going full-panic-mode. He ripped off his shirt.

Craig wondered what the right thing to say would be in that moment... He imagined it was a bit of a tender one between them. Clyde wasn't fat by any means, but his stomach hung down just the slightest bit and he clearly _hated_ showing it. He hated going swimming, or simply taking off his shirt on a hot day. He'd always had that slight bit of flab there to mock him and make him increasingly self-conscious when puberty hit.

His friend was too busy eyeing his chest, shoulders, arms, and cock. He couldn't give any less of a fuck about the belly pudge.

Clyde had a small patch of brown chest hair and a happy trail, leading from his navel down to the patch at the base of his arousal. Not too much, but just that ideal amount that Craig secretly had a thing for... Bless this stupid oaf and his hair.

His shoulders were wide and his arms were strong. Craig hadn't ever treated himself to the sight of his friend before, and was almost mad at himself for never noticing.

His friend's dick was about the same decent length as his own, but-

It was _thick_. Fat. It looked... _heavy_ when it'd sprung free from its clothed confines. It had this one pronounced vein trailing from the base, underneath, towards the uncut tip that Craig simply wanted to worship with his tongue. It had a slight upwards curve that was... simply perfect. Fucking hell.

God, that _leaking_ , flushed tip. Craig's tongue ran apprehensively across his teeth with the urge to swipe the head clean of every last drop pre-cum.

"...Now is about the time you take out a condom, or ask if she has one," he managed, still eyeing his friend's body appreciatively.

"I don't... Wait, yeah. Er, dad left some in the dresser forever ago."

The discomfort in Clyde's tone made Craig realize that he was staring a bit too intently.

"Your dad got you lube too, Clyde?" Craig managed to tease weakly. He propped himself on one elbow and reached for his dresser drawer with his other arm. He drew out a small bottle of lube and a single packaged condom. "I'll lend you a couple more if this is it... You'll definitely need more condoms for _Bebe_."

Clyde's nervous stare hardened momentarily in to a glare at the comment, but didn't linger. He was too caught up in the moment to argue.

"Do I need to use fingers on you?" he found himself blurting.

Craig blinked up at his awkwardly-shifting friend and tilted his head. "...It's been a while, and you're kind of... It would, uh... Really help me out."

He chewed his lip when Clyde nodded and reached for the bottle of lube in his hands.

"...What? Am I... Am I doing something bad?" Clyde suddenly pried with a fresh look of panic on his face.

Craig shook his head and cleared his throat. "No, no... You're doing fine, dude. Relax. Keep doing what you're doing."

When Clyde continued to look unconvinced, Craig offered quietly, "Bebe would be really turned on right now."

And he was sure she would be.

The brunette managed to smile weakly, but cringed at the squelching sound from the bottle as he squeezed way too much lube on his fingers.

"Better to use too much than not enough," Craig muttered as they both stared at some that dripped down on his pale leg.

He squirmed and lifted his ass off the bed a little when Clyde's lube-smothered hand moved shakily between his legs. There was a brief pause where Craig's eyes clenched shut in anticipation and Clyde completely froze up in realization.

Was this really going to do anything to help him? Sticking his fingers in his friend's ass? That seemed- Fuck. It _was_ gay. He was so fucking slow. He just realized _how gay_ the situation was, hovering naked over an equally nude boy with his fingers at the ready.

How the fuck was he supposed to back out at that point? Why was he so stupid. He wasn't gay. This was just... _happening._

"...Should we stop? We can just forget this ever happened. Never mention it again."

He wanted to feel relieved that Craig proposed such a thing. He wanted to jump right on agreeing with him, so things could get less weird and more normal.

He wanted to shout "NO HOMO!" as loud as he could from his window, in case the whole world and heavens were suddenly questioning him.

But he didn't. His hand just fucking moved in and prodded right below Craig's balls, making the raven jerk and suck in a deep breath.

"Don't just _jab_ my fucking gooch, dumbass."

"Sorry..."

Craig's hand suddenly grabbed his wrist and guided the fingers down to swirl at his entrance.

"R-right there."

Clyde wanted to yank his hand away in disgust.

His fingers weren't pressed between two plush, silky folds. He wasn't touching Bebe's soft, wet body... He was about to jam his finger his his childhood friend's ass. Fuck, he thought, what if it's... _dirty?_ Oh, _god._ It's- Well, it was Craig, so it definitely wouldn't be. Clyde found comfort in remembering how fussy his friend was with hygiene.

Regardless, he wanted to be disgusted when his fingertips swirled against the tight pucker, but he wasn't. He was so hard he could feel his blood pulsing through his arousal painfully. He just wanted to stuff his cock past that ring of muscle until he was balls deep in Craig Tucker, where he'd probably shoot off in three seconds flat.

The boy on his back shifted down on to Clyde's outstretched finger impatiently.

The brunette's choked gasp was drowned out by an uncontrolled groan from Craig.

"Yeah," Craig hissed, throwing his head back on the pillow. He was able to relax around the single digit rather quickly. "Another one."

He stared at his friend as his mouth hung open in shock.

Finally, Clyde managed to smile weakly and lined up a second finger. In a low, mock DJ Khaled voice, still slightly shaky, he muttered, " _Anotha one_."

Something about the sheer stupidity and bad timing of his best friend had Craig a little reassured. Hell, nothing could actually go wrong from this... This was just his friend Clyde being Clyde, even in a moment like this one. Nothing was going to change between them afterwards...

"Get your shitty memes out of here, Donovan," he replied with a breathless chuckle, despite a second finger pushing in to him clumsily. His back arched. "F-fuck... Scissor them a little and I think I'll be good."

In all honesty, Craig knew he probably needed way more stretching, but he was a bit too impatient and knew Clyde wouldn't want to sit through it.

His eyes clenched when the thick digits inside of him obeyed his order. Their movements were a bit sloppy, but completely addicting nonetheless.

"Clyde, you're _really_ hot. And it feels good."

"Ha, s-shut up, dude..." Clyde replied, clearly unconvinced. "I'm not... I have no idea what I'm doing... Ahah..."

Craig rolled his eyes up to the ceiling, wishing his friend would just take a fucking compliment. The raven didn't hand them out all too often.

"So, let's get to the point," he piped up after a few more seconds of awkward, purposeless scissoring, where Clyde didn't really seem to be seeking out his prostate at all. Now that Craig thought about it, Clyde probably had no idea what a prostate was... or at least not that he could stimulate it. He felt around at his side, where he'd let the condom fall, and ripped it open with his teeth. The fingers inside of him halted their movements. "You aren't getting much practice out of this, really."

Clyde nodded jerkily and took his fingers out. He grabbed the now unpacked condom.

The sight of Craig ripping it open with his teeth was suddenly permanently imprinted in his head, where it would persistently linger...

He struggled to roll it over his arousal for a few seconds. It was way too damn slippery. He'd softened up a little throughout fingering the other male and had to give himself a few strokes before getting the thing on. It wasn't that he didn't find it strangely arousing to have his fingers inside some guy he'd known for over a decade; he'd just been completely unconfident in what he was doing.

Meanwhile, Craig felt entirely empty. His toes were curling in anticipation by the time his best friend got the damn thing rolled down over his cock completely.

He spread his legs wider for him. Dull gray and hazel met once again when Clyde shifted closer.

"Do I just put-" Clyde struggled to find the words he wanted. "Why is this thing so slimy?"

"Yeah, go on. It's an extra lubed condom," Craig urged, lifting up higher to feel Clyde's tip press against his entrance. " _Slow,_ though."

"Craig, I- Thanks for letting me do this. I mean, you _really_ don't have-"

"Clyde, shut the fuck up and put it in."

The raven felt his friend shudder- or maybe he was just shaking nervously- and then do as Craig instructed.

"S-shit," he cursed in discomfort. Clyde just kept going, sinking in halfway, until Craig's hands shot out and gripped his shoulders. "Ow, fuck _!_ "

Clyde halted all at once and started to pull out, but Craig lifted his hips up quickly to keep him inside.

"Just slow-"

"Oh god, I'm so sorry. Are you okay? Fuck, I was rushing and-"

"Chill out. You're just big, idiot."

"Sorry..."

Craig stared up at his spooked friend in exasperation. "Don't be _sorry_."

"Sor-" Clyde caught himself before he finished and just waited for some kind of signal to continue. It was so unbearably tight inside. The condom felt weird; it felt like it was squeezed around him too tightly, suffocating him even more than the heat of Craig's body.

He felt his arms quiver like they were threatening to give out and send him toppling on to the boy beneath him. He tensed up to stay steady and started to release a deep breath. Some kind of unwarranted moan spilled out from behind his lips as he did so. He just want to curl up and die. He just wanted to stop. Stop and lie down and never talk about this ag-

"Clyde?"

His tightly-shut eyes snapped open to take in Craig's expectant stare.

 _Holy shit._

Craig's entire body was lightly dusted in pink. His cheeks were especially flushed. His rich black hair that was always neatly combed atop his head or hidden under his worn-out hat was entirely ruffled. His chest was rising dramatically and rapidly, and Clyde swore he saw his heart beat through his chest like the organ was threatening to burst right out and splatter all over his own face.

"Clyde," came that out-of-character voice of reassurance once again. Craig was laughing a little. "I said you could move."

Move? What did move mean? Clyde had suddenly lost the entire concept of "move." Right out of his vocabulary. If he did this "move" thing, he was going to cum. Right then. He was certain of it.

He heard Craig sigh and felt the small, nervous lump lodged in his throat rise up higher as he swallowed. Even though the sigh held a hint of amusement, he still felt like he was being hilariously disappointing... Craig had messed around with Kenny, right? And a couple of other guys- a couple that Clyde _knew_ about, anyway- as well... He was probably the absolute worst out of all of them... That's what he was telling himself, anyway.

"Sorry," he apologized for the thousandth time, "I had to wait a sec. I'm, uh... kind of close already."

As he finished speaking, he finally gathered the resolve to push deeper inside. He swore Craig was just about to give him some smart-assed, yet strangely comforting reply... But whatever he wanted to say just faded away when his mouth hung open softly and his head fell back against Clyde's pillow. Dull grey eyes rolled back towards the headboard and a quivering sigh seeped from his parted lips. If Clyde had just told himself that he could last a decent amount after his short wait, he'd completely fooled himself. That reaction by itself was enough to send him hurdling towards the edge. Add the sensation of being completely inside and lasting at all was basically a lost cause.

The only thing keeping him afloat was the condom, which took away the sensation of skin directly against skin.

"Are you okay?" he whispered breathlessly. He felt his cock twitch inside Craig as his eyes rolled back to focus in on him.

The raven hummed and nodded a bit too dramatically for his own liking.

"You're doing fine, Clyde."

Craig wasn't typically the most vocal of a partner, but allowed himself to moan in a slightly higher than normal pitch as encouragement. He was stuck between staying silent or basking in Clyde's stunned stare, drawn forth by the out-of-character sounds he'd never heard from his friend before.

In that moment, he imagined Clyde was trying to picture being with Bebe instead. The thought made him clam up. Hearing a guy's moans was probably the opposite of what his friend wanted... Fuck, maybe he'd just made things worse by moaning at all?

He considered calling things off right there because he found he didn't like the idea of... being used. What the hell, when had he started convincing himself it was anything _different_? But Clyde started moving, drawing back just a little bit before pushing back in. All Craig could think about in that moment was how badly he wanted the brunette to draw back to the tip, almost entirely out of him, before roughly slamming back in. Like he knew Clyde could do _perfectly_ if he was just a little more confident. He wanted to feel every inch in length and that impressive girth creating powerful friction inside of him.

He suddenly realized that his legs were trembling. Hard.

He wondered if he should keep talking him through things or let Clyde imagine on his own. He still felt some kind of stab in his chest at the idea of being a mere human practice doll, but was past the point of no return. He'd gotten himself in to this anyway, he reasoned.

Clyde was suddenly staring at him though, as if he needed some kind of conformation that the shallow thrust he just did was okay.

Craig finally resolved that talking him through it would help him get the best feel for it for Bebe, and Clyde probably needed reassurance in this just like very other thing.

"Pull out more, push back in harder. Angle upwards, guys have a g-spot too, same general area," he spewed. He had no idea that he was as breathless as he was until he heard himself speak.

"Okay, yeah I know... You- Ah, you got kind of silent for second so I was..."

Clyde trailed off on his own when he started to pull out. It felt- Holy shit, _amazing_. Even with the condom on. Craig was just clamped around him, like his body was trying to suck him back in like a vacuum when he tried to move away.

He didn't pull back entirely to the head of his pulsing cock, but got pretty close. He sucked in a deep breath that made his chest swell before snapping his hips back.

The sound that forced itself from his raven-haired friend's mouth was-

God, he thought he was going to melt in to a puddle right there. He had no idea Craig could make a sound like-

"Clyde," Craig whined. "Keep doing it, over and over."

 _Holy fuck Craig whined. Holy fuck._

That's all that registered for a few seconds, but when the rest did, Clyde snapped. He was close.

He just wanted to do _something_ right before he came way too early, damn it.

He leaned in a little for leverage and established a rhythm- a rather fast one- out of nowhere. To say it caught Craig off guard is putting it lightly.

Craig had told himself he wouldn't moan but there was just no way he could stop himself. He shamefully wrapped his arms around Clyde's neck and let a string of breathless curses spew from his slacked jaw. With his arms around the other male, he could feel his tense, muscular shoulders bunching up. His hands shot down to roam over Clyde's toned back on his own accord. _Fuck_ , fucking _bless._

"Yes!" he shouted suddenly when the brunette unintentionally grazed his prostate with the head of his cock. "Right there. Clyde, please- You're doing so g- _Ahhh_ , _nn_ 'shit! S-sorry..."

Under a haze of ecstasy, Clyde was slightly confused. _Craig_ was apologizing now? What for? Out of all the asshole-ish things Craig had ever pulled that Clyde had never heard him say sorry for... he was apologizing right then? At a time when everything was fucking fantastic in every way?

He wanted to voice his curiosity, but when he opened his mouth all that spilled out was a deep, shaky moan against his friend's ear. The noirette's back suddenly curled in a perfect arch. Woah, how the hell did it get _tighter?_ It was getting to be almost painful, like his buried cock was about to be pinched right off. Did _he_ do something to make it like this?

He tried to hit the same spot that made those fucking sounds slew out and bless his eardrums, and found it was a lot easier with Craig arched the way he was. He concluded he wasn't going to last more than twenty more seconds and tried to thrust harder and faster at the same angle.

Everything was clenching around him and Craig was making that foreign, intoxicating, strangled whine of his with every push back inside. Well shit, okay. Clyde was definitely only going to last _five_ more seconds. Forget twenty...

"Craig, jerk yourself off...! I'm going to-"

No smarmy reply. Craig just instantly obeyed, pumping his neglected arousal rapidly. The sight stole those three remaining seconds away in an instant. Clyde let loose in to the condom and felt like he'd never stop fucking _pulsing_ and _twitching_. He somehow wished that the rubber wasn't catching it all and that instead he was pumping his cum deep in Craig's ass, leaving a permanent indention of the shape of his cock. He wanted to move back and see his handiwork dribbling out like he'd fucking marked Craig as his-

...What the fuck? Why was he thinking that? Picturing that? He tried to ignore it to ride out the rest of his release.

He realized his hips were still moving viciously, like his body had become some kind of automated machine with only one purpose: to hit that spot that let him hear Craig make those intoxicating sounds. He groaned against his ear when he clamped down around him. It was like he was... He _was_ spasming.

Craig swore that he nearly floated right off the bed when he came. They made eye contact for a split second and Craig quickly looked away. He watched ropes of hot white splatter all over Clyde's stomach, getting pooled up in the rich brown hair under his navel.

" _Nnnngh,_ Clyde, _"_ he let spew out.

The boy above him finally stopped moving and slumped a little on top of him in exhaustion. He was still gazing at Craig's face; he could tell. _Why?_ He somehow felt vulnerable, getting stared at intently, because he knew his face was contorting in all sorts of weird expressions as he rode out his climax.

Clyde thought it was the greatest thing he'd ever seen since his first pair of movie tits at age thirteen.

A silence settled over the two as that painful thing called reason started to return. Clyde softened and slipped out and hesitantly looked away before Craig summoned up the courage to meet his stare. He rolled off on to his back to stare at his ceiling and listen to his wildly thrumming heartbeat.

"I didn't suck, did I?" he asked with a tinge of humor despite the worry stabbing at his throat and chest. He looked down at his still-covered member and started to take the condom off.

He held his breath when he heard Craig force a shaky laugh. Fuck. He did awful, didn't he? He focused on trying to tie up the stupid thing, eyeing the _stupid_ amount of jizz he'd emptied in to it. He tossed it in the trashcan near his bed, thankful he didn't miss and have to get up.

"You're... gonna do just fine, Clyde. Could you really not tell how much I was enjoying... You just- You were fucking great, okay?"

They didn't look at one another but Clyde smiled weakly anyway. For him, everything was still fantastic. He did _great. Craig_ told him he'd done great. The pickiest asshole in the whole _world._

He sensed something different in the air though. He rolled on his side to face his best friend, who still didn't look back at him.

"Thanks, dude. You're seriously the best." Clyde beamed. "I feel so much better about the whole thing now."

Craig dared to look at that fucking oblivious grin and instantly regretted it. This- It had mistake written all over it. He sat up and scoured the floor for his underwear.

"...We should get dressed."

Clyde's smile waned. "Oh. But, my dad won't be home 'til... Yeah, guess you're right."

Normal, distant Craig was back. Clyde missed the previous state he'd dragged him into already.

They dressed in silence and Clyde watched, somehow feeling guilty, as Craig rubbed his lower back and sat down at the edge of the bed with a look of slight discomfort. He was just about to propose they watch a movie, when-

"I forgot about some paper I have to write for class tomorrow. I better go do it."

Clyde felt something sink inside of him at the excuse. Craig was looking around for his wallet and keys.

Craig didn't write papers. It was Friday. Their Friday.


	3. Chapter 3

Craig didn't know why he'd wanted to leave. When he rushed out the front door and got to his shitty car parked on the street in its usual spot, he regretted it instantly. The deflated look on his friend's face suddenly registered in his mind's eye, leaving him with with an unbearable guilty feeling. _He'd_ been the one to tell Clyde to not make a big deal about the whole thing, and here _he_ was, making a big deal about the whole fucking thing.

He didn't know why something had changed for him in the middle of it all... He didn't know _when_ or _how._

He knew he was being ridiculous, but something was still keeping him from turning around and hurrying back to Clyde's room to laugh the whole thing off.

He started the car and accidentally gassed it a bit harder than he meant to, making his tires squeal as he sped off in to the night.

When he made it home and stepped inside, his sister was sitting in the adjacent living room watching television. She eyed him with a look of confusion that quickly turned to something more knowing.

"Did you have a fight with Clyde?"

Not wanting to explain it any differently, _especially_ with his mother stepping out from her bedroom down the hall to eye him confusedly, he just nodded.

"Do you want to talk about it?" his mother added in with a worried look. Everyone knew Clyde and Craig didn't fight. Not enough for Craig to ever come home from his house, anyway. Whenever they had an argument, Clyde would usually end up getting emotional and Craig would drop it out of guilt, or Craig would avoid the entire thing until Clyde gave up.

Ugh, he'd rather shoot himself than explain anything. He didn't even want to think about it... Think about the way Clyde made his...

He shook his head and hurried up the stairs. He hadn't meant to slam his door, but his body yanked the knob a bit too strongly.

Only then did he check his phone. He laughed a little to himself, knowing Clyde had probably blown up the fucking thing at that point... The guilty feeling rose higher, forming an unpleasant lump in his throat. He was almost too scared to look, but he forced up the will, and-

There wasn't a single damn text or missed call. Clyde hadn't eve tried to convince him to go back. He'd just-

He'd just gotten what he wanted from the moment Craig stepped in to his room and that's all that mattered... Tch, _practice._ That was it, wasn't it? Craig felt some kind of irrational anger bubble in the pit of his stomach. His ass was beginning to feel a little sore, just so his helpless friend could _what?_ Get a feel for sex. What a stupid _..._ What a stupid reason for the whole fucking thing to happen.

He knew Clyde wasn't like that; he never meant any harm with any little thing and this wasn't any different. He was probably just too conflicted to call... He'd just wanted some help, Craig gave him some, and now Craig was blowing the whole thing out of proportion. His friend was probably panicking beyond belief and it was all his fault.

As the noirette settled down under his blankets dejectedly, still in all of his ruffled, wrinkled clothes, he still felt unreasonably upset. Not at Clyde, but at himself.

* * *

Clyde let out a whine as he woke up to light shining through his window. The dreadful stab at his heart returned instantly as he remembered last night. He snatched his phone from his dresser - that same fucking dresser Craig had drawn a condom and lube from, ripped that package open with his perfectly straight teeth framed by swollen pink lips - and bit his lip nervously.

 _Please,_ he begged internally. _Please just send me_ _something, man._

He saw a new message...! But it was from Bebe. He wanted to smile like he usually did to her friendly, sometimes flirty texts, but all he'd really wanted was one from Craig telling him everything was okay.

It felt so wrong to wake up on a Saturday morning without Craig still sleeping on the other side of his bed, his back turned and their bodies as far apart as the queen bed would allow to avoid any awkward snuggling during sleep.

He tried to calm himself down. Craig was probably still sleeping. His friend always slept to at least noon. Surely he'd let him know everything was okay as soon as he woke up. Craig never brooded over things for too long, aside from when Tweek broke up with him and he basically pulled an Emo Stan for two months.

 **[** _Good morning Clyde. ^^ Do you still want to come over tonight? ;P_ **]**

She'd sent it about five minutes before he woke up. Clyde always replied to her _instantly_ , so he imagined she was expecting a text back at any moment.

He swallowed and set his phone back down. He had a horrible case of morning wood that needed some attention first.

He didn't even fucking know how he was able to get hard. He'd cum so hard the night before it was like he'd be set for a fucking month.

Yet there he was, staring at his ceiling shamefully as his hands slipped under his boxers. He stroked himself lazily and found that he couldn't get much out of the thought of what he'd be doing with Bebe later... He imagined he'd be able to if he just wasn't so worried about what happened with Craig.

Craig.

He stroked himself with a little more purpose. The shame he felt somehow boiled hotter, but he continued to replay the previous night and try to ignore the dreadful feeling.

He thought about Craig's moans. Holy hell, he had no idea his friend could even make such sounds. He wondered jealously if Kenny McCormick had been able to make him _scream_ and quickly tried to push it away because it wasn't helping...

Well, actually, the thought of Craig screaming in pleasure helped a whole damn lot if he imagined himself as the cause. He bucked his hips up in to his fist. He tried to reimagine the feeling of being inside of him. It was still fresh on his mind.

His hand was a joke in comparison to Craig clamped around him. It just couldn't recreate that amazing feeling. When he came, only a little dribbled out... At least he wasn't hard anymore.

He tried to shake of the nagging feeling that told him he shouldn't jerk off to the thought of fucking his best friend. Reaching for his phone, he finally replied to Bebe.

 **[** _yeah! when should i come?_ **]**

He didn't have to wait long for a reply. When he heard the buzz, he hoped it was Craig even though he knew that was unlikely. He didn't know why he was still disappointed when it was her. He _knew_ he genuinely liked her. He'd liked her for so long it was sad... God, he was just so fucking confused. He groaned aloud.

 **[** _Is 8 okay?_ **]**

 **[** _sure see you then :)_ **]**


End file.
